There’s something in us that rises up when we’ve been wronged, isn’t there? When someone slanders us, disrespects us, cheats us, or just flat-out mistreats us, that urge to get even kicks in. Suddenly, you’re not just angry; you’re plotting, planning how to even the score. It’s not enough for them to just get what’s coming to them; you want to be the one to deliver it. You even convince yourself that God must’ve put you in this situation so you could be His tool of vengeance. But let’s cut to the chase—you’ve got it all wrong.

You see, vengeance, revenge, payback, or whatever you want to call it, is a natural human instinct. When we get wronged, our pride flares up. It’s not just about justice; it’s about us feeling vindicated. We tell ourselves it’s righteous anger, but let’s be real—it’s often just plain old self-righteousness. You’re not upset that God’s laws were broken; you’re mad that your ego took a hit. And then, the justifications start rolling in. “Well, if I don’t set them straight, who will?” or “Maybe God put me here to teach them a lesson.” But before you get too far down that road, let’s look at what God actually says about revenge.

“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:19). Notice that? God’s making it pretty clear—vengeance belongs to Him, not you. And if you think for a second that God is asking you to be His instrument of wrath, you’re confusing His will with your pride. There’s a reason God says, “It is mine to avenge.” He knows that our hearts are too twisted with sin to carry out vengeance with a pure motive. We mix in anger, pride, and hurt, and suddenly we’re no longer interested in justice; we’re interested in payback.

You’ve heard the saying, “An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.” There’s a reason Jesus came and turned that idea on its head. In Matthew 5:38-39, He said, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.” Now, let’s not misinterpret this. Jesus isn’t telling you to be a doormat. What He’s saying is that vengeance is a cycle that traps you. When you take matters into your own hands, when you decide you’re going to be the judge, jury, and executioner, you’re stepping into a role that belongs to God alone.

There’s a story in the Bible that shows just how wrong we can be when we take on the role of avenger. Remember David and Saul? Saul was chasing David all over the wilderness, trying to kill him out of sheer jealousy. David had every reason to take vengeance. There were moments when Saul was right there, within David’s grasp. One swing of the sword, one stab of the knife, and his problems would’ve been over. In fact, David’s men even told him, “This is the day the Lord spoke of when he said to you, ‘I will give your enemy into your hands for you to deal with as you wish’” (1 Samuel 24:4). Sounds like God set it up perfectly, right? Wrong.

David didn’t take the bait. He said, “The Lord forbid that I should do such a thing to my master, the Lord’s anointed, or lay my hand on him; for he is the anointed of the Lord” (1 Samuel 24:6). David recognized that vengeance wasn’t his to take, even when he had every reason to justify it. He left it in God’s hands. And what happened? Saul’s own actions eventually led to his downfall. God took care of it, but David didn’t have to soil his hands with it.

See, we’ve got this urge to be the instrument of justice because it feels satisfying. We think that when we get back at someone, it’ll make things right. But here’s the thing: It doesn’t. It just creates more mess. Proverbs 20:22 says, “Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for this wrong!’ Wait for the Lord, and he will avenge you.” When you take revenge into your own hands, you’re not fixing anything; you’re just perpetuating the problem. You’re saying that you don’t trust God to handle it, so you’re going to step in and do His job for Him. That’s not righteous; that’s arrogance.

We like to think God is on our side when we’re wronged, that He’s cheering us on as we craft the perfect comeback, plot the perfect revenge. But let’s look at what God’s nature actually is. “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love” (Psalm 103:8). When we’re tearing someone down, when we’re holding onto that grudge, we’re not reflecting God’s nature; we’re reflecting our own sinful desire to see someone else pay. That’s not the heart of God. God’s heart is for reconciliation, for redemption, even for those who’ve wronged us.

Think about Jesus on the cross. If there was ever a moment where revenge would have been justified, that was it. He was mocked, beaten, falsely accused, and nailed to a cross. And yet, what did He say? “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). That’s the nature of God. Not a quick-tempered reaction, not a desire to strike down those who hurt Him, but a heart full of mercy and forgiveness. If we call ourselves followers of Christ, then we need to embrace that same heart.

But let’s be honest. Mercy doesn’t come naturally. Forgiveness feels impossible when you’re staring at the face of betrayal, when the sting of someone’s words or actions is still fresh. But God isn’t asking you to do this in your own strength. He’s asking you to trust Him, to lay down your need for vengeance at His feet and let Him handle it. Romans 12:20-21 says, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

When you decide to let go of your desire for revenge, you’re not letting the other person off the hook. You’re letting yourself off the hook. You’re saying, “God, I trust You more than I trust my emotions. I trust You to bring justice in Your way, in Your time.” It’s about surrendering control and allowing God to work in ways you might not see or understand.

Maybe you think you’re doing God a favor by stepping in as His hand of justice. Maybe you’ve convinced yourself that you’re just fulfilling your duty to set things right. But let’s be real. God doesn’t need your help with vengeance. What He needs is your obedience, your willingness to reflect His heart of grace and mercy. You might be the only representation of Christ that person ever sees. Are you going to show them a God who is quick to punish, or a God who is slow to anger, abounding in love?

Don’t get it twisted; God is a God of justice. Wrong will be made right. But His justice isn’t reactive; it’s redemptive. It seeks to heal, not to destroy. When you get caught up in the cycle of getting even, you’re playing a game you were never meant to play. You’re handing over the reins of your heart to bitterness, and in the process, you’re blocking out the peace that God wants to give you.

So what now? You let it go. You lay it at the feet of God. You pray, “Lord, I feel wronged, I feel hurt, and I want to get even. But I know that’s not Your way. I know that vengeance belongs to You. Help me to trust You with this situation. Help me to forgive as You have forgiven me.” And then you move on, not because it’s easy, but because it’s what God calls you to do.

You’ve got to stop thinking of vengeance as your right. You are not the avenger; God is. And He’s a lot better at it than you are. Your job is to trust Him, to reflect His love, and to let Him take care of the rest. Because when you do, you free yourself from the chains of bitterness and step into the peace that only comes from obeying the One who knows what’s best.